Train the Child
“So the wisdom of this verse is in its view of children; not vessels to be controlled, but as God-ordained temples to be dedicated to God’s individual purposes for them.”
“...with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” Ephesians 4:2-3
I’m sure it’s news to no one that all kids are unique, but I’m also sure I’m not the only one that imagined my parenting strategies could be applied equally to each of my kids simply because they were all the same gene pool. HA. That’s all I have to say about that. But Proverbs has plenty more to say about that…and it’s much more helpful.
Years ago, someone said “The human heart is drawn to what is beautiful,” and that truth really stuck with me. I’ve seen it prove true in a thousand circumstances, including my parenting, and our verse in proverbs implies the same truth. You see, the Jews had a moral law that they were intent on raising their kids by, but the original Hebrew meaning of our verse wasn’t about forcing compliance from our kids. It was about dedicating our kids and our parenting to the Lord and then making wisdom taste good to our children so they would grow to crave it.
Sounds simple as well, but anyone have kids who have very different tastes? Yeah, same.
So the wisdom of this verse is in its view of children; not vessels to be controlled, but as God-
ordained temples to be dedicated to God’s individual purposes for them. It gives us the
intentional job (and truly, the gift) of drawing our kids close, knowing their unique character,
their bents, their abilities and how they feel loved, and then leading them in the truth of God’s Word in a way in which they individually will crave it. We’ll work this out practically this week.
So we have the job of holding each child to the same standard of God, but we get the gift of
training each child individually, because…well they’re individuals. The Bible reminds us that
through that personal care, individual attention, and intentional love of how they’re
wired, they’ll grow to see God’s love and appreciate the beauty of His wisdom in their own way. In a way that sticks for them. And when they are old, their hearts will honor it.
Faith Follow-Through:
This week, take some time to grow in motherhood and faith:
Tuesday:
Dedicate.
Today, as a means of creating a rooted connection with our kids, we’re going
to verbally bless them. We’re going to start by dedicating their hearts to the Lord and then
blessing them every time we eat (because we’re all guaranteed to do that a few times.) When we reach for food (or coffee if that’s your sustenance) were going to speak God’s identity, God’s future, and God’s gifts over them. And then we’re going to bless them out loud, to their faces, every time we see them eat. It’s just as important that they hear the truth of God’s Word about who they are. Science says those words of affirmation will create deep rooted ties of love and build belief in their brains of the beauty of God’s ways.
Here are some verses to help:
1 Peter 2:9 “But you ___(their name) ____are chosen, a royal priest, part of a holy nation, gods special possession, that you may declare the praise of Jesus who called you into his wonderful light”
Philippians 1:6 “Be confident of this ____(Name)___ that Jesus began a good work in you and your life that he will make sure he finishes as you stick with him.”
Ephesians 4:7 (AMP) “Yet grace [God’s undeserved favor] was given to (insert their name) each one of us [not indiscriminately, but in different ways] in proportion to the measure of Christ’s [rich and abundant] gift.”
1 Peter 4:10 “But you have been given grace by Jesus, and I bless you to use
whatever gifts He’s given you to serve others, as a faithful steward of God Gifts.”
Wednesday:
Discern and nurture.
Today, intentionally observe your child’s unique temperament, interest, pace and gifts. If your kids are grown, spend some time thinking on them. Find an opportunity to affirm a God-given strength and use it to teach them something about God’s love, character or way. Remind them God designed them perfectly for His glory and His plan for them, and that you’re so glad you get to be a part of their lives.
Thursday:
Connect and direct.
In Hebrew culture, our proverb this week is all about associating faith and wisdom with joy, sweetness and family warmth… what’s more beautiful than that?
Creating a faith centered home, whether you’re the only believer or your kids have flown the
coop, is biblical and scientific. We were designed to walk out our faith together so our kids learn to walk with Jesus themselves (at any age.) This can look like making a tradition of morning prayers, truthful tongues, having eyes for the hurting, kind words, mouths that are slow to speak. Want a scientific double whammy of connection and direction? Spend 10-15 minutes with each child, doing what they love and talk about one or two of these while you play. Science says the connection of your words to positive feelings will be tenfold.
Written by Brooke, mom of 3
