How to Love
- Cathrine Schmelzer
- Nov 6, 2024
- 3 min read
“It is the Holy Spirit alone who can show us how to love in every situation.”
“Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments.” 1 John 5:1-2 (ESV)
We are months into a new school year and have encountered our first middle school “situation.” There is a high school boy who has been sitting across from our sixth grader on the bus, just to stare at him for the entire ride home. Our son has been rattled by this, but God gave me a check to ask for more information rather than become angry or upset (“Tell me more…” is a consistent prompt in our home.)
And like every time we choose to trust the Spirit’s prompting in our lives, it turns out our eleven-year-old son had been making fun of the high schooler’s sister, and he had come to the front of the bus to keep an eye on her. OUCH. My mom heart didn’t see that one coming…it also wasn’t sure where to go from there.
Then I remembered this verse, which explains that if we say we love God, we also should love His people. Period. No exceptions. No exclusions.
Maybe this means simply ignoring in middle school; that doesn’t seem necessarily loving, but it’s better than speaking mean words to someone because another “friend” told you it would be funny. Given the right circumstances, choosing to say nothing can be loving someone well, while in other situations, it would be exactly opposite of what God wants us to do.
It is the Holy Spirit alone who can show us how to love in every situation. I don’t think any of us struggle with this biblical truth: we know we show our love and commitment to Our Father when we care for His children…it’s the HOW that is harder. But God knows exactly these things and more, AND He offers to help us! He does not drop this ridiculously difficult life-long challenge on us, then leave us to work out the details ourselves. He loves us too much to do that. No, He PROMISES His Spirit to provide for, and abide in, us for all of our hard situations.
So now we pray, and are confident He will give us the right words that reflect what He wants to say to our son, not what we want our son to know. He is a child of God, yes, but so are the other people in this story. Everyone deserves God’s Love AND our love in whatever way He calls us to show it.
Action Steps:
Remind yourself that your children are your first and most important disciples. If you encourage them to love God and others well, but aren’t doing it yourself, they will notice your actions over your words every time. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide your words and your actions with others in mind!
Today, choose to begin picking up the pieces of a broken conversation or relationship in which you know you have not loved the other person well.
Prayer: Help me today, Lord. You alone know the days before me and the days ahead, and I humbly ask that You make Your presence known in each moment of this day. Guide me to love others well using Your Love, pure and uncomplicated, as my example. Thank You for loving us and teaching us Your truths. Amen.
Written by Caitlin, mom of 2 boys