From Insecurity to Confidence
- Cathrine Schmelzer
- Sep 21
- 4 min read
“Biblical confidence is a soft but steady flame — not in ourselves, but in God…”
“Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.” Psalm 34:5
Something I don’t hear mentioned much — but is as real as laundry piles — is how rare one on one time becomes with your adult children.
But I have a treasured exception.
Every Tuesday, I have the privilege of babysitting my granddaughter Charlie and my son Christopher — wise, funny, and refreshingly real — comes early. Just early enough for us to have a sweet little pocket of time. About 30 minutes, give or take, for a chat before he heads to work. I treasure it. No subject seems too small or too weighty.
This week's topic? Insecurities.
Christopher’s main point was simple but true:
Everyone has them.
After he left, and as I began my morning chores — the holy rhythm of dishes, dusting, and straightening — I found myself mulling over that truth. God wants us to be confident. But how does insecurity sneak into the picture?
Here’s what floated to the top:
Biblical confidence is a soft but steady flame — not in ourselves, but in God and in who He says we are. It rests on His promises, His presence, His power, and His perspective.
Have you ever really stopped and asked:
“How does God see me?”
Be honest.
“Is my answer shaped more by “MY opinion of myself” or His Word?”
Because if God’s view of you matched your harsh inner critic… well, He would be lying.
And God doesn’t lie. Ever.
“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.” (Hebrews 13:6)
“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion…” (Philippians 1:6)
Biblical confidence says:
“I can do this, because God is with me.”
“My worth is secure, because God calls me His.”
Now, pride; that’s the culprit. Pride is the root of insecurity.
It whispers that you’re self-made, that you’re better, that you don’t need anyone. It makes you an outsider.
Pride’s bait? Control, comparison, need for credit and desire for attention to feel “built up.”
But its reward? Loneliness.
“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6)
“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (Proverbs 16:18)
So, if you’re feeling relationally dry — friendships sparse, laughter rare — take a gentle peek at your pride level. Because let’s be honest:
Proud and insecure people aren’t attractional because pride isolates and insecurity depletes.
But a woman anchored in God-confidence?
She makes eye contact that says, “I see you.”
She has spiritual energy.
Her words soothe.
Her presence feels safe.
Her humor? Sweet and life-giving.
She listens with her heart, not just her ears.
God-confidence draws others to her.
God-confidence softens her words and makes people feel safe in her presence.
You are known.
You are seen.
You are held.
And you are confidently His.
Written by Phyllis, mom of 3
Faith Follow-Through:
This week, take some time to grow in motherhood and faith:
Monday:
“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.” (Hebrews 13:6)
Pray with me: Lord, I come before You today, thankful, humbled, and in awe of who You are. You are my Helper in times of need. What can the world do to me, with You on my side? You pour Your God-confidence over me when I feel unseen, unheard, unknown. God, when pride and insecurity come creeping back in, will You remind me of how You see me? Remind me that my harsh inner critic is wrong, and I am YOUR CHILD. Thank You for all that You are. Amen.
Tuesday:
“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion…” (Philippians 1:6)
Pray with me: God, thank You for this truth. My security and worth are found in being Your child. In Your plans for my life. When insecurity starts spreading lies in my mind, remind me of Your promises, Your presence, Your power, and Your perspective. You are an awesome God. Amen.
Listen to “Truth I’m Standing On”, by Leanna Crawford, and pray those words over any situation you might be struggling with right now.
Wednesday:
“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6)
Pray with me: God, sometimes the pride in my life doesn’t look how I expect it to look. Sometimes it’s hiding in forms I don’t even recognize. But I want it gone. Will you show me what I’ve missed, and help me replace those icky prideful thoughts with Your God-confidence? Amen.
Spend a few extra minutes in prayer today, and listen to what God wants to say to you.
Thursday:
“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (Proverbs 16:18)
Today, talk to God about your pride. Make this prayer personal to YOUR life, YOUR situation.
Start with: God, there’s so much pride in my life. I need Your help with…
Tell Him what the pride is doing in your life (causing insecurity? Comparison? Making you think you don’t need anyone, or refusing to accept help? Making you an outsider, lonely?)
Ask Him to guide you to truth, to scripture, to gentle nudges to remind you that you are known, seen, held. You are confidently His.
