Friendship on the Fence
- Cydnee Curtis
- Jul 16, 2024
- 3 min read
“But here in James we are reminded of the fence we sometimes sit on. Trying to conform and fit in, but knowing we aren’t called to fit in. We are called to stand out like Jesus did.”
“You adulterers! Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of god? I say it again: if you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God.” James 4:4 NLT
“The pressure to fit in is real”... If that's not an understatement, then I don’t know what is.
I’ve felt it my whole life, in all areas. Through middle school and high school, in new workspaces, in mom groups and co-ops. You name a situation, and I can promise that I have had many cringe-worthy experiences. Even when I gave my life to Jesus, there wasn’t a moment the enemy would waste to make me feel unaccepted, leaving me desperate, thinking I needed to try anything to just belong. Satan is always pointing out a flaw of mine, reminding me why I don't fit in, even when I’m trying my best to live like Jesus.
But here in James we are reminded of the fence we sometimes sit on. Trying to conform and fit in, but knowing we aren’t called to fit in. We are called to stand out like Jesus did.
Maybe we are getting backlash for the cartoons we protect our toddlers from. Maybe it's the sleepovers and peer groups that our tween has skipped out of. Perhaps it's the Christian college we encouraged our kids to go to. Or maybe it's just the morals in dating, marriage and parenting that we've tried so desperately to instill in our kids. It's hard out there to fit in, in the middle of a world that claims we all have our own truths, and it often leaves us seeming weird to that world around us. Whatever it may be, I’m sure you too, mama, have felt the tug of heart strings as we made choices for our children that left them (and us!) feeling ‘left out’.
But there is always good news when our Heavenly Father is involved! If we flip James 4:4, we learn that becoming close to God sometimes makes us an enemy to the world. AND THAT'S OK! We are not called to be friends with this world. Generous? Kind? Self controlled? YES! But never were we called to be in friendship with this world. And that's good news, friend. So take a deep breath and know that if the world thinks you’re weird for living like Jesus, then you’re probably on a good track.
Action Steps:
Ask God to show you ways that you may be trying to befriend that world, that you need to change.
Ask God to give you friends that point you back to Him. Search for those friends, and hold on to them.
Prayer: Father, I thank You for the season of motherhood that You have placed us all in. Through the stresses and heartaches, and victories and joys, You have written each day in our books. Lord, I ask that You would remind us of who our identity is in, so that we don't strive to fit into this world. God, I ask that You would quiet the enemy’s lies and give us the confidence to keep striving to be more like You, even if it makes us weird. In your name I pray, amen.
Written by Cydnee, mom of 4, sitting on God's side of the fence