The Gift of the Helpmate
- Chelsey Dematteis
- Aug 30, 2024
- 3 min read
“Knowing I’m a safe place for him to land and the keeper of his heart gives me a deep sense of peace and security.”
“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18
A huge role that often parallels motherhood and has a huge impact on the way we parent is marriage.
I sadly walked into the great gift of marriage cynically. I thought more about how “hard” it would be rather than anticipating all God had in store for my husband and I. I believe much of this was caused by my lack of understanding surrounding what a gift it is to be called the “helpmate”.
As I was praying before writing to you, I kept coming back to these two questions:
•How did “helpmate” get such a bad reputation?
•Who decided that being the helper, the safe place, and the keeper of her husband's heart, to be such a restrictive role?
These questions both get the same answer, the enemy.
What God meant for good, the enemy came in and thought he could have his way within God’s design for marriage. I know that’s what satan believed was going to happen within the confines of my marriage, but God’s ways are higher, the conviction of the Holy Spirit was stronger than the tugs of this world, and Christ got the victory in my marriage.
When we seek scripture, which is where we should always begin, we see in Genesis the exact moment God desired to give Adam a helper (Gen 2:18). It’s a beautiful picture as we watch the role of a woman and her womanhood unfold. We were named the helper. Not just any helper, but a suitable helper. Lean in and listen to this, (especially if you are feeling frustrated in your marriage), God created you with your husband in mind. How special is that? Two people, purposed for the Kingdom, to live life together before we took our first breaths. Powerful, right? This one truth completely shifted the way I was able to view my role as a wife and eliminated the lies the enemy and culture tried to tell me.
Submission to my husband means I get to live submitted to God’s design, and submission to God’s design is a beautiful thing. Being my husband’s helper is a badge I now wear with honor and intention. Knowing I’m a safe place for him to land and the keeper of his heart gives me a deep sense of peace and security.
Remember - be his helper, his safe place, and the keeper of his heart. God made the two of you with each other in mind. “The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18
Action steps:
I have a 7-prayers for your husband downloadable reading plan on my website! I challenge you to take the next week to pray these prayers over your spouse and choose to serve him with intentionality. GET THE PLAN HERE
Pray for your heart to love your role as the helpmate. Bring your frustrations and praises to the Lord!
Written by Chelsey, mom of 2, keeper of Corey’s heart